church shopping

I hesitate using the "church shopping" title given its negative connotations and very individualistic approach. However, let's call a spade a spade as that is exactly what D and I have been doing.

For a variety of reasons we took a year off of going to church. The break was important for us but it's now time to go back. Since we were not going to go back to our previous church we had an opportunity to look around. Get a sense of what's out there beyond our own denomination. The driving force in our hunt for a new church was diversity. Within minutes of entering a service I knew if we would be coming back or not. If one scan of the gathering resulted in a sea of white faces we would not be returning.

We tried a number of churches recommended to us because of potential diversity. One even had a pastor from Jamaica. But overwhelmingly the chairs were filled with white people. Honestly, I was ready to give up.

I must mention here that there are a number of churches filled with refugee and recent immigrant families. I work with newcomers in our city and love the many opportunities I have to interact and serve this population. When looking for a new church I am being selfish. Newcomer families experience many barriers when in a new country, immediate needs that I am well aware of. In looking for a church we are searching for us, for our needs. Selfish I know. Some parts of being a transracial family require this. There are times when we need to put T and our family first.

We are hoping to invest in and develop relationships with black families who have a certain sense of stability and are able to invest in our lives.

I had all but given up hope in our quest for a diverse church, when as a last resort I asked some questions to a women I was only trying to make conversation with. I thought why not ask...but I know what the answer will be as this community area appears quite white. I was slightly shocked (I'm sure my face showed it) when she told me that there was diversity in the church which included some black families with kids around T's age as well as a Hispanic population.

So we tried it out.

I did the scan...and smiled.

The church is still largely white but there are a number of black young adults, families, and older adults. More than any other church we've attended.

We've now been attending this church for a month and this last week noticed another black family with a boy who looks to be just a bit younger than T. I get little goose bumps thinking about potential opportunities to get to know these families. 

I think we found our church. This search was less about the preaching, singing, programs, community area and more about creating opportunities for T and our family. Now the harder part begins...working to intentionally get to know these families and hopefully develop relationships in the future.