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Saturday, November 7, 2009

perspective at 2:00 in the morning

Baby T isn't a great sleeper, during the day or night. We're often up 2-3 times during the night, which in itself isn't unreasonable for a 2 month old, but T struggles sleeping anywhere that doesn't involve mine or D's arms. There are times when at 2:00 in the morning it takes 1 1/2 hours to get him back into the crib. (For interest sake I have thought of co-sleeping but he is a noisy grunty baby!).

I've found that I am in general less willing to "complain" about the things that are hard about having an infant in the house. It's not that I feel like I'm not entitled to talk about the difficulties because we choose this and wanted it for so long, but rather I very clearly remember listening to many, many parents complain about what they found hard and the whole while I was thinking, "yes, it is hard, remember to enjoy your baby and be thankful that you have one."

At 2:00 in the morning while holding baby T, watching the minutes tick oh so slowly on the clock, I do acknowledge that it is hard, of course I would love it if he slept great on his own and didn't need holding for an hour...but mostly I love the fact that I have the great privilege of snuggling this beautiful boy who is my son. I know that this time will pass too quickly and soon he won't want to be held and rocked for hours on end. Soon he will be too big (ok, that is coming sooner rather than later!) to fit like a puzzle piece in my arms.

I waited for a really long time to have the opportunity to be up in the middle of the night with a baby, I will be realistic about the hard stuff but at the same time I feel so blessed to gaze into the dozing eyes of this ridiculously cute sweet pea...even at 2:00 in the morning.

5 comments:

Alysia and Derrick said...

I love this post. I love your honesty. I have often thought about whether or not I will dare admit I'm exhausted, when we finally have our baby, even though my friends who have babies talk frequently about how tired they are. I have thought that I will be afraid to mention the parts that are hard, scared that I might come across as ungrateful, and I know no matter how tired and cranky I am, I will still feel very blessed. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings.
Alysia

Kara said...

Enjoy the middle of the night snuggles while you have them, cuz as you said, the time will pass by far too quickly. Hoping that T sleeps better for you guys soon. Anytime you want to take a nap I would be more than happy to come and snuggle T!

luna said...

I know exactly what you mean. and baby J is getting BIG -- so big that my arm tingles and I lose feeling in my hands and my back aches from bouncing all the ball at 3am... but what can you do.

Kim said...

I remember waking up many times a night for many nights (my kids were never good night sleepers). However, I enjoy the quiet of the night, the sweet baby breath on my cheek and the feel of that little heart. It is so precious. On the especially hard nights, I remember thinking that God was pretty smart making babies so cute...even in the middle of the night they are so hard to resist! Enjoy...he is gorgeous. I really enjoyed our visit this week too!

carol said...

It is always good to look at the bright side. Also, they don't stay little for long and then there will be other things to "enjoy" like potty training, writing on the walls....